kittykaley.com

took baby to the beach to see the waves and rocks

feeling down now that my mom has moved into her new place. i’m happy for her cuz it’s hell being here. it’s just so dark, dusty, depressing and cramped. we will be moving things soon and having the baby room done and our room will be revamped so i hope all that helps cuz right now it’s shitty living space. idk how people live with so much clutter. i don’t do well mentally in areas with tons of clutter. i miss my own room where i had it constantly cleaned and redecorated every month. i feel home sick without my mom and family. i’m not very independent and never have been so being alone all day in this room with a baby and a narcissist old witch in the rest of the house sucks. i’m depressed and i see my psychiatrist tomorrow maybe i need to up my medication idk. 

we watched Smile 2 and i was disappointed that Kyle Gallner died right in the beginning. the ladies be watching cuz of that king 😍 

i dread today. i might just do what i planned and take babygirl over to my moms during the days at least til i can start moving stuff in her room. just have to wait for my mom to get rid of rest of her stuff in there, the narc mom to get rid of all that furniture in there i don’t want that she hoped i’d keep. she still tried putting her sewing machine in there but in like no….. this isn’t a storage room this is my babys room. 😒 glad my bf told her no. so they’ll be renting a small storage unit to keep stuff in. i don’t get why the mom can’t just throw stuff out. why do you need to keep this furniture you’ll never used that’s hardly even furniture at all it’s DIY junk you made that looks ugly with shit you found at thrift joints or side of the road garbage. like why not throw it out. oh wait. hoarders can’t throw stuff away. 

transition baby into crib is gonna be hard once that rooms together. she’s been cosleeping with us forever and it’s gonna be so hard to transition her into her own room in her own bed. i dread it but once she’s comfortable sleeping in her own i’ll finally hopefully get better sleep at night. it’s just gonna be hard letting her cry it out. hearing her crying and doing. nothing is torture. but they say you have to gradually let the time get longer and longer during their crying before checking in. sigh it’s gonna be so tough