good talk last night

so my bf and i were in the kitchen preparing tonight’s dinner while baby was asleep and he was telling me how happy he was his mom went away, as in to bed. he said she’s just so weird and negative. he came home and she was all friendly and nice then she came in to talk to sophia while all of us were sitting in the room. my mom engaged a bit with her in a friendly way and she left. after she was stomping around, not talking, not harassing us at sophia’s bath time and was just off and mad. my bf was like saying she just sucks the energy and happiness from him. i said i told ya!!! this. this is what i’ve been trying to tell him for so long. this is why i don’t like being here. this is why i wanna move out with my family. he told me to never let her make me feel uncomfortable cuz she’s a weak minded person. i’m stronger than she is and i shouldn’t take her bull shit. he’s right. my mom tells me the same thing. but i’m still too uncomfortable and too quiet. don’t wanna talk to her or engage with her period. she makes me sick. 

so i find out that she holds this house over his head all the time. which i figured as much. she also said to him yesterday “you’ll see that i’m right. it’s all gonna happen and i should say i told you so but i won’t” like??? bitch shut the fuck up. he told me she says that shit to him all the time. she acts like she knows everything and we’re all too stupid. 

basically this old bag thinks she’s something special. some chosen one that knows things that are gonna happen. like everyone is gonna have money and everyone’s gonna be living the life BUT can still work if they want to. lmao???? she thinks all of the pedos in hollywood and everywhere are gonna be found out. she thinks she and this group of people of facebook or whatever are the only ones that know and no one else does. i mean she paid scientology 200k to get higher up in ranks. she thinks she’s something special. it’s so fucking comedic but at the same time so fucking scary. she has delusions of grandeur. she’s a communal narcissist. i hate her. she talks to her own son like he’s some moron and she knows it all. and to keep holding all of your stuff over his head so when you die he may or may not get anything? that’s sick. 

fucking whack job and the more and more i hear about all this shit the more she disgusts me and i want nothing to do with her. i want her away from my baby too. people that have delusions like this scare me because they’ll do anything. like my bf said she’s hot or cold really fast. i’ll tell you the reason she was mad yesterday. it’s because when she came in to try and talk to us we were all on our phones. we didn’t bring out the welcome wagon and start jumping for joy when she walked in. narcissists get mad when you don’t give them the praise they think they deserve. the attention they think they deserve. it pisses them off. i don’t get what the fuck else she wants because she. same in and gave us a stupid suggestion for sophia to bathe in the tub and my mom was being nice saying it was a good idea. i never talk or listen so i sat on my phone uncomfortably waiting for her to leave. 

she makes everyone so uncomfortable cuz she’s always mad about something. you can feel it in the air. it radiates around the house. i tell you when she leaves, the house feels less hateful. i feel less hateful. she brings people down. my bf is about to start more arguments because he’s ready to tell her that bitch down the street that just comes in when she wants is a bad influence. she’s a bad, negative and toxic person and the mom is already bad as it is. so when that lady comes over, the mom is in a bad mood and is all mad about everything here. she just walks in the house and shit and he’s gonna tell his mom she’s not allowed to anymore. he said he’s gonna try to just be stern but has a feeling he’ll  be mean. so that’s coming. 

i’ve decided to TRY not to be so hateful when she’s around or when  i have to walk by her. instead… make it funny.  like thinking how lame she is and weak minded and pathetic she is and laugh about it. instead of hating. i always get so disgusted when i have to walk by her but from now on i wanna try not to give a fuck. shes a nobody. a loser who had to pay her way up to a delusional top rank. it’s just pathetic and sad. so i’ll look at it like that. tho i still think she’s a nut job and all. she does make me uncomfortable cuz cults and shit always have creeped me out. i just can’t live so hateful. she’s making me hateful and i don’t want her to win that. i don’t wanna be brought down to her misery. that’s what people like her want. they want us to know they’re mad and upset. i wanna try and ignore it like it ain’t bothering me.