happy 7 months

the silliest girl in the whole world

honorable mentions 

updates

7 mo here we we come big girl ❤️ tomorrow marks the day. hopefully she’ll let me take cute pictures tomorrow without a screaming fit. so her 2 bottom teeth are so cute but still not fully out yet. 

she’s starting to  get into books so we decided to start taking her every week to pick out some books. she likes the textured page ones. also the finger puppet books too. i haven’t been able to sleep well past week. 4 hours a night for me so thankfully she fell asleep early tonight so i took a nap with her. i’m still tired but i need to make bottles and such. i’ve noticed a change in her sleep too lately. not sleeping fully well thru the night and not falling asleep easy. maybe it is developmental. they say when they go thru growth spurts and learn a new skill, they have a hard time with sleep cuz they want to perfect these new skills. 

i don’t even wanna talk about that bitch but more drama with the weirdo. so one day my mom and i were standing in here with baby girl and she walks by and aggressively shuts the light off. she’s so annoying about turning off all the lights. she sits in the dark all day in the house, shuts off the porch light when we turn it on at night so we can see when we get back, she yells “lights!” at my bf i heard when he is doing laundry. such a bitch i can’t. so i sometimes leave the hall light over on our side of this house and today she aggressively shut it off. so i yell “OFF OFF OFF OFF LIGHTS OFF OF OFF” cuz i got mad about her attitude about it. so i turn it back on so i can clean. i cleaned the hallway floor, bathroom and the bedroom while sophia was asleep. she ended up waking up so i went back in the bedroom. i see the crack in the door. lights go out. she came back over here again to shut them off, including the bathroom light when i was going to come back in there. so i went out in the hallway and flicked the lights on and off obnoxiously. she sat on the couch and acted like she didn’t know i was doing it. she’s so fucking ridiculous about it so i act ridiculous back and laugh cuz it’s so fucking weird. 

so i tell my bf this and he was mad about it because she’s being passive aggressive. she’s mad about soMeThInG and has to prove she is. so he told her tonight to stop doing that. he pays half the electricity bill and extra and she does that. he told me the bill is 77 bucks cheaper this time around and she still does that. so it ain’t about money. it’s to be a bitch. she told him i left it on a long time which is a lie. she was back over here turning it off within 20 mins. she’s so fucking stupid. mahhh you turned it on? i’ll turn it off. mehhhg my house mehhgggg. like stfu. i was about to tell her to fucking stop if she did it while i was cleaning. i’m starting to lose my grip here with her. i hate her around me. i want to hurt her feelings. i want her to stop doing weird shit. i want to tell her i hate her. i thought of a mean thing i could say and when she comes around every time during bath time with my baby i should say “could you please leave this is family time” like when i get fed up with ba people i don’t care. i don’t care if i hurt their feelings. over it. she’s such a bitch all the time. then acts like she’s not being that way when she’s around me. tonight she didn’t come around during sophia’s bath time cuz she got called out by her son. i told on her. he told her to stop it like a grown up telling a child. it’s so embarrassing. good. i was so much happier and relaxed with my baby giving her her bath. it was so fun. anyways done talking about her. 🖕🏼

sophia has reached new milestones. she is now fully eating purées. she also tries to grab at my plate for my food and when i stop her she cries. so i started feeding her again while i eat too so she feels like it’s breakfast and dinner times. she’s been eating black beans for iron and fiber for dinner. we puréed a ton of them so some are in freezer. mornings she likes oatmeal and fruits. i’ll start making my own but for now i’ve been buying the little pouches for her to try. she also drinks water now and is getting so good at using a sippy cup. she can hold it up herself and drink from it. i can’t believe how times flies and she’s so big now getting older. it makes me want to cry by so happy at the same time. i can’t wait til holidays with her. halloween is gonna be so fun with her. trick r treating around the neighborhood. this neighborhood goes all out with tons of kids walking around. she’ll only be able to sit up in a stroller but she can see everyone and all the kids. get candy for mommy and daddy to eat hehe. we were gonna get her this gremlins costume but i’m afraid it’ll still be too hot too wear here. so we were thinking a lady bug. i’ll just be a fairy or something simple since no bar scene this year but family time. so i am gonna order this fairy looking dress off of dollskill since i found one on sale twice. add wings. bf wants to be something annoying instead of being forest creatures with us. he wants to be longlegs from the movie with nick cage. we watched it the other night and laughed so much over it. 

sophia at restaurants

we took sophia to cracker barrel on Monday. they gave us this weird looking baby seat that i was not expecting. i thought it was gonna be your average baby chair they give you at restaurants but instead it looked like some electric chair. it was a wooden seat with a belt nailed to it. had no choice but to use it so we put her in and she sat in it decently. she did tilt to side though. she was really good and we got to eat our food without issues. we took her to stores and other places. she had a good time that day. hardly fussy at all. 

tuesday we took her to Lures for lunch 

where she was also very good and let us eat our food without issues. she did bump her head on the table and cried so bf picked her up and she stopped crying. he sat her back down and again, no issues. she became a bit fussy though toward the evening. we took her to Paulseidons cuz he was having a make your own pizza day. she cried when my friends tried to talk to her though. she’s still a bit off with people she doesn’t know or doesn’t remember. she let Meaghan hold her tho which i was surprised. i honestly think she was tired and has been teething. when we were changing her diaper at cracker barrel i saw 2 white ridges. her teeth are coming thru which is so exciting. her to little bottom teeth 😭 

tuesday night before going to make pizzas

i asked bf to stay home from work yesterday cuz i just didn’t want to be alone here all day. so he stayed home and we ate junk food all day. sonic breakfast and taco bell for dinner. back to eating better now. i refuse to eat anything from the house tho right now cuz something died behind the cabinets. more than likely mr dabs injured a mouse and it went and died behind there. it has smelled so fucking bad in the kitchen for almost 3 weeks now. more than that, gnats are all over the place cuz of it. i can’t deal with it. it makes me wan to cry its so gross and frustrating. the gnats are the grossest part. they keep landing on everything. all of my babies bottle stuff. it’s pissing me off. i made diy gnat traps and have caught like at least 100+ gnats. fucking gross. i’m gonna buy some bug spray too and spray it around also. i can’t take it and idk what else to do. i hate it here as i always say. but i never had any of these weird ass issues in any other house. it’s this house. from flea infestation that killed my pets to dead rats smelling the house up now these gnats. this house needs exterminator and the weirdo mom won’t call one cuz the sprays cause cancer or some bs 🙄. i don’t wanna get started i’ll start up on another tangent. but i wish this would pass cuz i can’t eat here and i don’t like making her bottles here. i’m about to take her sterilizer and all her bottles and formula into her cuz i can’t take it. 

sophia is awake way too early. she woke up at like 6am and was babbling and moving around. she fell back asleep and woke up at 730am and i’m still awake with her babbling and moving around. as one can tell she is still not sleeping in her crib cuz i have yet to force it. it’s just in so tired by night that i don’t wanna deal with it and having to get up multiple times at night to give her a pacifier or something. it’s easier when she’s near me. she’s all over the place now. grabbing everything, rolling around, close to crawling and started moving forward in her walker. she’s gonna be super mobile really soon. they better start thinking about baby proofing the rest of this junk house cuz it’s now. 

i put her in her crib during the day to let her get used to it. i put her in at nap times usually too. but if i put her in there awake she’ll understand eventually this is her own place. 

good bye frank n stein

frank n steins restaurant has been here since i was a kid maybe even longer. i remember going there and seeing sugar ants on the table as a kid (all i remember from it) then i went a couple of times with my bf and bro once. so they’re changing names and owners and im so sad because its historic here. the sign has been there forever and its a cool one 

so we went there one last time and got hot dogs and loaded fries. 

took sophia to barnes and noble to pick out a book. she also went in the pool today. she loves it and i’m so happy. 

we were squirting her with water lol believe it or not she didn’t get mad about it. 

sophia and the park

pictures with daddy. today is my turn 

sophia liked the park a lot. she was excited and so smiley. it was so hot outside though that we couldn’t stay too long. august is brutal outside in florida. i hate florida 😭 

stopped by bfs work and saw paige. she got to see sophia finally. i’ve noticed that sophia is not liking strangers now. she use to smile at them all the time and now she cries when they talk to her. she didn’t cry at paige but she was close. i think she’s starting to really understand who is who. she knows everyone in this house and okay with that but strangers, nope. she cries every time now. 

good talk last night

so my bf and i were in the kitchen preparing tonight’s dinner while baby was asleep and he was telling me how happy he was his mom went away, as in to bed. he said she’s just so weird and negative. he came home and she was all friendly and nice then she came in to talk to sophia while all of us were sitting in the room. my mom engaged a bit with her in a friendly way and she left. after she was stomping around, not talking, not harassing us at sophia’s bath time and was just off and mad. my bf was like saying she just sucks the energy and happiness from him. i said i told ya!!! this. this is what i’ve been trying to tell him for so long. this is why i don’t like being here. this is why i wanna move out with my family. he told me to never let her make me feel uncomfortable cuz she’s a weak minded person. i’m stronger than she is and i shouldn’t take her bull shit. he’s right. my mom tells me the same thing. but i’m still too uncomfortable and too quiet. don’t wanna talk to her or engage with her period. she makes me sick. 

so i find out that she holds this house over his head all the time. which i figured as much. she also said to him yesterday “you’ll see that i’m right. it’s all gonna happen and i should say i told you so but i won’t” like??? bitch shut the fuck up. he told me she says that shit to him all the time. she acts like she knows everything and we’re all too stupid. 

basically this old bag thinks she’s something special. some chosen one that knows things that are gonna happen. like everyone is gonna have money and everyone’s gonna be living the life BUT can still work if they want to. lmao???? she thinks all of the pedos in hollywood and everywhere are gonna be found out. she thinks she and this group of people of facebook or whatever are the only ones that know and no one else does. i mean she paid scientology 200k to get higher up in ranks. she thinks she’s something special. it’s so fucking comedic but at the same time so fucking scary. she has delusions of grandeur. she’s a communal narcissist. i hate her. she talks to her own son like he’s some moron and she knows it all. and to keep holding all of your stuff over his head so when you die he may or may not get anything? that’s sick. 

fucking whack job and the more and more i hear about all this shit the more she disgusts me and i want nothing to do with her. i want her away from my baby too. people that have delusions like this scare me because they’ll do anything. like my bf said she’s hot or cold really fast. i’ll tell you the reason she was mad yesterday. it’s because when she came in to try and talk to us we were all on our phones. we didn’t bring out the welcome wagon and start jumping for joy when she walked in. narcissists get mad when you don’t give them the praise they think they deserve. the attention they think they deserve. it pisses them off. i don’t get what the fuck else she wants because she. same in and gave us a stupid suggestion for sophia to bathe in the tub and my mom was being nice saying it was a good idea. i never talk or listen so i sat on my phone uncomfortably waiting for her to leave. 

she makes everyone so uncomfortable cuz she’s always mad about something. you can feel it in the air. it radiates around the house. i tell you when she leaves, the house feels less hateful. i feel less hateful. she brings people down. my bf is about to start more arguments because he’s ready to tell her that bitch down the street that just comes in when she wants is a bad influence. she’s a bad, negative and toxic person and the mom is already bad as it is. so when that lady comes over, the mom is in a bad mood and is all mad about everything here. she just walks in the house and shit and he’s gonna tell his mom she’s not allowed to anymore. he said he’s gonna try to just be stern but has a feeling he’ll  be mean. so that’s coming. 

i’ve decided to TRY not to be so hateful when she’s around or when  i have to walk by her. instead… make it funny.  like thinking how lame she is and weak minded and pathetic she is and laugh about it. instead of hating. i always get so disgusted when i have to walk by her but from now on i wanna try not to give a fuck. shes a nobody. a loser who had to pay her way up to a delusional top rank. it’s just pathetic and sad. so i’ll look at it like that. tho i still think she’s a nut job and all. she does make me uncomfortable cuz cults and shit always have creeped me out. i just can’t live so hateful. she’s making me hateful and i don’t want her to win that. i don’t wanna be brought down to her misery. that’s what people like her want. they want us to know they’re mad and upset. i wanna try and ignore it like it ain’t bothering me. 

6 month pediatric visit

sophia now weighs 20 lbs & got the go ahead to start drinking water out of sippy cups. dr said that her drinking water & purées are more for her to practice more than getting nutrients. she said formula is still the main source for her nutrients. so still doing what we’ve been doing except not putting the oats in her bottles but instead giving it to her as oatmeal. so still 3 5oz bottles morning, afternoon and night. rest of the day 4 oz bottles   purées 2 times a day at morning and evening (4oz total). 

sophia’s dr is pregnant & said she’ll be out on baby girls 9 month appt but to not let anyone else get assigned to her 12 month visit cuz she said she has to see her then. she said she got teary eyed thinking about it. she loves sophia and i can imagine being her dr since birth makes it special to see her grow to a 1 year old. seeing the progress 😭 now i’m teary. but the cool thing is, we were assigned my childhood dr for her next visit. dr susan was my dr when i was 10 or so. she was always so nice to me. she was also my bro & sisters dr growing up. i wonder if she’ll recognize me. if not i’ll ask her if she remembers who i am. 

sophia screamed her head off during this visit. hated being checked, hated being weighed & obviously hated her shots. she was okay once again pretty quickly once i picked her up. we went shopping and then decided to take her to crawdaddy’s happy hour for lunch. we first sat at a normal table and we put her in the high chair and all was smiles. but in order to get happy hour you have to sit at the bar side. so we had to sit at the high top tables so sophia was way lower. that killed the vibe & she started to cry. the waitress was trying to be so nice to her. she got her a popsicle & tried feeding it to her but nah. sophia screamed her head off i felt so bad for the people at the bar trying to relax lol. so i held her in my lap while we ate. i think the shots side effects were kicking in and she was cranky. 

i put her in her crib tonight and i hope she stays asleep all night in it. i’ve been slacking and being too tired just letting her sleep in bed with us. but i need her to get comfortable in her own bed.  i dread tomorrow being stuck here again. just when i got my car situated to start taking her places alone my bro started his job and is using it. it’s so hard on solo days in here. hate it. 

sophia’s first restaurant outing

so for my brothers birthday my dad came down and took us all out to eat. so me, my mom, brother (obv), sister and her bf, my bf and baby girl. we sat sophia up in the restaurant high chairs and she was soooo goood. she didn’t cry or anything she sat up with us. we were all able to eat our meals and i fed her at the table her puréed food so she felt included. she was so good and i was so happy 

she was good all day honestly. before we went to eat, me, my mom, sophia and my dad drove around looking at apartments. i told my dad everything going on at the house with senior psychopath and made it clear my mom and brother need to leave. so we need to get something so they can move and i can come over daily. we narrowed it down to 2 apartments so far. i think it’s gonna happen soon. 

more passive aggressive comments coming from the mom again tonight 🙄  we get it. you’re mad and negative no one talks to you. no one talks to you cuz you’re an energy vampire and it’s always about you or your delusional beliefs. negative nelly makes me negative and hateful. i hate feeling that way. 

sophia 6 months old

happy 6 months sophia 💜 she turned 6 months 2 days ago but couldn’t get around to taking cute pics 

went to see Deadpool and Wolverine today with my brother. my mom was supposed to go but she said she didn’t really feel like going today and only was cuz she told my brother she would and he got the tickets. so i complained of course cuz i hate staying here so bad. i didn’t wanna be stuck here any longer. today was just rough i felt so depressed it was hard to interact with my baby :( hard to be silly and stuff so i tried occupying her with toys and stuff without saying too much. i felt horrible about it. so she said she’d watch sophia while i went. i liked the movie a lot it was funny and fun. lots of surprises too cuz i went in blind not knowing what it was about this time. i just knew it was deadpool and wolverine together. i felt a lot better just being able to be baby free for a couple hours and put my mind elsewhere. it helped a lot. 

also my brother spilled the popcorn 

i wasn’t gonna go back to this primary care dr but i’ll at least get my blood tests done to find out what’s up with any of that. they called and pestered me today so i figured ill just come in and do it. so i have to get up early so my bf can watch sophia while i go before he goes to work. i also had to ask them if they faxed that referral and the girl said it failed to go thru so she said she’d do it again. why is this stupid podiatrist referral such a fucking issue? it’s harder than it seems it should be.