so i was supposed to have a primary care appointment today to get my referral for podiatrist, referral for psychiatrist and updated check up to refil meds and what not. well it didn’t happen. so i finally started my period yesterday and it’s bad. it took the whole month of not coming to the point where i was paranoid about being pregnant again. i took test and it was obviously negative (thank god) but still no sign of it. i did read that your period isn’t regulated for a long time after you give birth. so it finally came and today it was messy. of course on my way out the door the my appointment that i was late going to. no more tampons in the bathroom and no time to stop before the appointment. so i’m paranoid because it is messy this month. like crime scene messy. so i have no time, im filled up and have no other protection. we finally drive far to the appt only to be at the wrong fucking address. we drove all the way deep in stuart for nothing. so i called the place and ask if they can still see me or should i reschedule but the phone disconnected. i think the front desk hung up on me on accident. i was close enough anyway so i just went inside. the girl said she told me on the phone not to come cuz i can’t be seen today. in like ? well i didn’t hear that it disconnected 🙄 so i couldn’t be seen cuz i was too late for no reason except stupid us for not looking up proper directions to this place. so i had to reschedule and come in tomorrow at 11am. so we’re in bed early tonight so i don’t miss this time. she gave me papers to fill out and i noticed my info being so old. i haven’t been seen my this place YEARS. i stopped coming after my fave, long time doctor moved on. so they had my old email address from AOL and my last address.
so tomorrow i’m gonna ask for the podiatrist referral so i can fax them it and i won’t be charged for it. i also need a referral for a psychiatrist asap. i am not doing well mentally. not being here anyway isn’t helping. i truly believe if i didn’t have to live like this i’d be totally okay. but his mom and the house just suck the life out of me. i need medicines to help me cuz i can’t do this.
took sophia in the pool today and she finally got to use her floating raft thing. she loved it and had such a good time. ^u^ she’s so cuuuuuute
i’m having a hard time getting her to stay asleep in her crib. she’ll take naps in there fine. at night, it’s so bad. she’ll pass out and then the moment i lay her on her own mattress she wakes up. then i put her back in our bed and she falls right asleep. ??? what to do? the first time she slept in her crib i got such amazing sleep. i wasn’t hanging at the edge of the bed like usual cuz she takes up the bed space and pushes me off. i had gotten great, spacious sleep. now she’s bad in bed next to me and i am not feeling like my sleep will be great. i really need to figure it out she needs to sleep on her own. it’s just i don’t wanna play the up and down game where she cries and i have to keep getting up to soothe her. when she sleeps in our bed next to me she seems to sleep til morning. sigh i need her to learn tho so i can have my space of the bed. but hey at least her selfie game is getting better
today wasn’t 100% bad, we did get ice cream today and bf was disappointed he spent 12 bucks on a small hello kitty keychain i conned him into buying lol. honestly if i knew it were that expensive for that thing i would have said never mind but he said she rang it up and that’s how he found out the price. oop.
this is how i feel most days
No comments:
Post a Comment