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February 6, 2022

my sister's 21st birthday was a few days ago. so me and my bf met her up at the local bar so we could give her the birthday gift my bf picked out and let her finally meet some of my friends. when I tell you that bitch can drink... she slammed like 6 or 7 drinks. and I mean downed them. it was hilarious to see her at a bar for the first time. walking around asking people what drinks they were drinking, walking across the bar and ordering drinks. I have video of her sitting across the bar just waiting to get her order taken. it cracked me up. some people are funny to watch in general... but this was pretty funny (in a happy way). I recorded it to send to my mom so she can see my sister in action.
she got so drunk that as we left, she was crying over some drama my friends are having with each other. her.bf was walking her to the car and she just sobs and drunkenly expresses how upset she is that someone was mean to my friend. 😂

my bf and I went to Dennys after my sister and I parted ways around 2 30am. idk how I stayed awake. I was dying by that time, waiting for our food to come. I could NOT sleep the night before so I was awake all night, then all day then all night again until like 6am. I finally got my sleep on Saturday. my brain doesn't shut off ever. so I'm laying there thinking about a million things at once. I tried sleep meditation videos... nope.

I don't know why. either mania or hormones but today I feel so angry. while I was driving home to tend to my guinea pigs I felt the urge to slam my car into the one in front of me. I imagined it and everything. I just wanna punch someone. that's weird and horrible. but I feel like I have some much pent up rage. I don't like it.

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