christmas was better than I thought

My family and I didnt exchange gifts since money was extremely slim to none this year. But we did have a delicious dinner my sister made for us all. Me and my bf came over to eat dinner with my family Christmas night.

My boyfriend and I did exchange gifts though. Hes been bugging for a cat for months and I figured I'd adopt one for him. My sister and I drove over to this cat sanctuary and it was really fun there. 100s of cats of all kinds. Old cats, kittens, and impaired cats. We went in and literally felt a connection to this loving boy named Mr. Dots. He is a big ole boy too. Met a couple of the others but we both knew Mr Dots was the one. He is sooo loving. So I picked him up dropped him off with my mom while my sister and I ran around doing other errands and picking up cat supplies. I wrapped a cardboard box up so it looks nice but didnt enclose the cst obviously. So we showed up at his house and brought in the big polka dotted box. When he opened the box, out popped Mr. Dots. He was curious immediately of his new home. Its been less than a week and hes already feeling at home. He sleeps on us and "makes biscuits" on us. Im so glad I picked the loving big boy he is. Im glad my bf is happy as well.

After I brought the cat over, my bf had to play music that night for open mic night. So we went out to that, went out and met friends and then back home to the cat!

I also got my bf a brand new comforter that looks like the paintings we've been making. He needed one since we have been using random blankets. He bought me a few Harley Quinn items, a cute dress, a reversible plushie and a few other items. I did paint my bro, sister and mom a painting each describing their own vibes. Like, I painted a nature looking one for my mom, a pink and purple one for my sister and a marvel looking one for my brother. 

Had another night of lsd and painting. Which is so funny when you're tripping because you see so many colors and things that look so amazing but then when the next day comes you're like oh... that painting doesn't look that great at all. 

I did my roots so that my hair is freshly blonde for New Years and my birthday. Just finished toning the ends of my hair and my extensions. Which I hope doesn't just look purple/grey which purple shampoo tends to do before a few washes. 

another stressful past few days

So0o... my tire needs replaced. 2 days ago I was on the way to my boyfriend's and I smelled burning rubber... then loudness coming from my car. I saw my tire light on as well and knew my tire was flat. So I carefully drove the rest of the way and called my boyfriend on my way... we took it to the nearest gas station to try and fill it with gas. Nope. Didn't work. Slowly drove it back and left it there and tried the air pump at his house. Nahhh didn't work. So I ended up dropping it off at a tire place nearest. Woke up at the ass crack of dawn to drop off my keys to the place and found out that new tire will be about 130 - 150.00 that i do not have. So my bf has to use his Christmas present money to pay it BUT his mom said she would help him pay for it which is so nice. I am so poor right now it is NO joke. My family may not even have a Christmas unless good news comes thru. So I have been depressed. Just want everything to work out ugh

Aside the sadness, I did put together my guinea pigs cage with a new flooring and 2 windows  can see them thru lol

Went to the mall this weekend to point out things I want for Christmas for my boyfriend to be aware of.

I want these 2 Harley figurines I found in FYE 

pigmas

decorated more for the guinea pig cage. next i need to decorated my hamsters cage. 

my bf bought Lasso a Christmas tree today. ok so we treat my stuffed bear Lasso like a person 😂 so yea we take him on adventures and act like he is alive (he is) and we got him a lil tree to set up.

we have been feeling artistic lately and painting canvas and stuff. heres one i made last night. i use all suicide squad harley colors. pinks, blues, gold and a lil red.

tonight im gonna make a christmas themed one. 

-=/

 says all of my blocked numbers are temporarily available because of a recent emergency call i made. but i didn't make an emergency call, wtf. no emergency numbers are in my recents. i have no idea.

super tired the past 2 days. mid-week had to deal with some stressful stuff that are still unresolved. hoping to have them resolved soon. Christmas time is the worst time to be dealing with money stress ugh. 

super annoyed that netflix decided to up their prices to 14 bucks a month. like come on...  i really need to be able to watch the new season that should be coming at some point the Thai series The Girl From Nowhere. I MUST be able to watch that when it comes. 

I just ate breakfast; ham and cheese omelet with hot sauce on top, 2 bacon pieces and fruit. I might go back to sleep a bit, my bf isn't done with errands 'til about 12 30 - 1pm. so I can sleep a bit more ;D

I miss traveling up north and seeing snow every year. Florida Christmases just aint it. but it's been nice lately with the cold weather. waiting on more people to put up christmas lights. my bf and i drive around and look at them on weekends. quite a bit re up now. there is this one house near my house that goes all out. they make it like a christmas land and actually have a real santa claus sitting out there. but since corona idk if they will have him out there this year.

good weekend

this weekend i went to a drive in movie for the first time. friday the 13th played on friday the 13th. i went with my boyfriend and his daughter while she was visiting. it was actually a lot of fun and wanna go back.

on saturday i ended up going out as seen here:

had a lot of fun as as usual on weekend im drrrrunk. before all that though, we went to dinner with bobby and meaghan. went to fujyiama where they cook in front if you and do fun stuff. basically benihana. i barely ate because i wasnt hungry but had amazing left overs.

depressed still. i tried getting out of it last night but back to sad. whenever i am sad and becoming manic due to bipolar i shop. i go on massive sprees. i am poor too right now, so this isn't good right now.

just ordered 5 pairs of lashes, shoes and an outfit. ;[

i feel so fucking depressed. i don't want to get out of bed, shower, eat much or even move. i just lay in bed all day and night the past couple of days, staring into nothing with the hours long anxiety attacks. i can't take this. i don't want to feel this way & i can't make it stop. my mind wont stop. i can't breathe sometimes over it and my vision shakes. my sister is making me some dinner 'cause it's obvious something is wrong. i'm sad, tired and feel helpless right now. pray 4 me ;[

 what kind of tools are these? I thought they were dental tools but I'm thinking maybe more art tools. like for sculpting clay?? I don't know but I tried searching these same ones. I found them at some shop that sells vintage items.

 hungoverRrrr. 

of course the package didn't cancel and they shipped it. but I cancelled the delivery & it said they will refund me and return it so that works.

went in the hot tub again at a friends house and took out my extensions. of course left them there too I think. but maybe not and I brought them home to my bf's? don't remember but will find out after my bf is out of work tonight. I hope they're there. make things easier.

wish i could sleep this hangover off. :[

stuff to say

 Halloween night was fun. EXCEPT wtf with the costume contest. Us and another group went beyond with our ideas. Neither of us won. Who won you might ask? A girl dressed as a CAT! wtf, how generic can you get. Oh wait, her ass was hanging out and she had her group of friends cheer her on so she got the loudest vote. BS man. aside from that rigged contest the night was pretty fun. I got hammered and apparently went to a cemetery after which I have no recollection of but the pics prove otherwise.

I ordered a new Instax Mini (version 11) last night and cancelled my order because I didn't want to wait 2 days. So I re-ordered it so that I can get it tomorrow instead. so fucking dumb. I never think I just always act impulsively... so now I'm paranoid that the first order won't cancel. I mean, it hasn't shipped yet. says it's preparing for shipment and that it isn't guaranteed to cancel. so I am all anxious and worried over this. I guess if I get both of them in the mail, I can return it for a refund at Kohls where they accept Amazon returns.

this election thing is happening I guess. people get mad when you don't vote. but I don't vote because they are all corrupt. I can't do it. I just can't. I feel wrong voting for either parties 'cause I just don't like either of them. I also get so fucking annoyed by the celebs that constantly tweet shit about politics. no one cares what they have to say. I have literally blocked so many celebs that don't stfu about their ideas and beliefs on politics just so I don't have to see their annoying posts. like they think they do something... everyone is allowed to voice opinions. even celebrities but god... some of them it's just ALL they talk about. & people that are like "if so and so becomes president, I'm leaving the US". it's like fine bitch. leave. no one cares.

ok I am done rating.

I cannot believe Christmas is already almost here. then my birthday, gag. I don't even want any party. I just wanna be taken out to dinner or whatever and then go out for drinks in a party dress. I don't need a decorative party like last year. let's just hope this year I don't fall off a fucking chair and dislocate my arm again. 😁

halloween night was fun

sigh

 going to this open mic thing my bf is hosting tonight and I really don't want to go. like I'm just gonna sit there with anxiety by myself cuz he'll be busy playing music. should only be 3 hrs and I hope it goes by fast. I'm so tired. been awake since 8am. i watched some really weird fucking movie called Skins (Pieles). then a decent one called Cadaver.  anyway, supposedly this is gonna be a weekly thing every wednesday. makes me annoyed. I better get more psychedelics for this dammit. 😁

gotta go finish my hair then leave.... sigh..... 

I just threw up while i was driving wtf

boring

finally got a new car battery. hated being stuck at home all week. this weekend I went in a friend's hot tub and got crazy bruises all over my legs and arms from smacking around the tub. I'm hurtin'. we got our Halloween costumes. I hope the size is correct and the outfit fits well cuz I won't have time to return it for a different size. 

everything is sucking right now

 so my phone is off cuz the bill. my bf tried texting me 10 times today but i didn't get them because my phone was off and didn't know it. then he called me somehow which I can't figure out how cause my phone was off... but he told me his car battery too is not working. so both of our cars have broken batteries. he's calling AAA tonight... I am having them come tomorrow to jump my car so I can get it to the car place I got my last battery. my battery has a warrantee for 5 years and my  battery is only 3 years old. so they should swap it out for free. I told my bf the same info 'cause we both have the same battery brand. wtf tho that ours both randomly messed up like that and we have the same brand. 

so I gotta do that and figure out my phone to get the data turned back on. thank GOD it wasn't turned off yesterday when my car didn't start at the gas station. 

exhausted

barely slept the past 3 days or so. had late party nights, going out and waking early and shopping around. we went to the Halloween store Friday to look for my Bunny mask I keep trying to obtain. still out of stock. went out Friday night and got trashed but of course ;o) and like 3 friends passed out at the house. once they left we went back out again Saturday night, drunk off my ass. then Sunday my bf had work and I ran around shopping with my sister and mom 'cause I was bored. once he got off work he then had his band pals over to do a photoshoot which they made me get in a couple. >_> ugh. I was so tired at that point from the previous late nights and early mornings. but of course they wanted to go out and grab drinks so I tagged along and was beyond exhausted. the night was okayish. I wasn't my normal drunken upbeat self though. 

so I left home this morning and followed my bf to the gas station... as he was leaving the gas station to head to the tattoo shop, my fucking car wouldn't start. so I texted him like don't leave yet my car isn't starting. no answer as I watched him drive off  >:| so I called him like 20 times and no answer. so I panicked and almost cried so I called my sister... she tried messaging him too. no reply. so I sat there at a gas pump and had a panic attack. I texted my friend Paige and asked her if he was in work yet and if so tell him to call me. he FINALLY called back, his notifications were off of course. so he comes back and helps me jump my car. it ended up working after like 15 - 20 mins. so I made it back to my house. I'm gonna have my sister's bf check the battery. might need a new one. sigh. 

one funny, nice thing. this weekend we went out to Home Depot 'cause my bf was getting stuff to make some craft project or whatever. I went in lookin' hella plain but my hair was in 2 space buns. normal, average clothes (imo), no makeup... and some elderly woman was like "you look like a little doll. like you would have a wind up thing in your back. she kept going on and on about the doll thing and said with my little backpack and all was cute and doll like lol it was funny, but yea I looked meh that day so it was nice to hear. I also lost 2 more lbs. so I lost 8 total so far. 

I really need sleep. 

hair fail

bleached my roots finally yesterday and I notice pieces of my ends? of hair are breaking off. oop. I should have been more dilligent in not letting any bleach get on my already processed pieces. So I am going to be conditioning a lot. needs to grab some leave in conditioner and more argan oil and try not to use any heating tools on it for a bit.

people make me so sick. I am watching That Chapter on YouTube and have been binge watching his videos for a week now. He's such a good crime YouTuber. dude is in a league of his own. but what's annoying is when murderers rather kill their spouses than get a divorce??? I just don't get that. so many fucking weirdos out there man. I am so paranod out in the world but I think that's a good thing 'cause I am aware. but I pretty much think everyone is up to no good. on my way home from my bf's this morning I noticed some guy parked in the Savannah's nature trail parking lot. like, what was he doing? hiding a body?? people may laugh but it happens. sometimes I think people that have been behind me for a while on the road are creeps stalking me. yea I think all my life being so into true crime stories it's got me overly aware of everyone!

period started. cramps are severe. back to low carb eating after 3 days of eating shitty. gotta get back on track!!! going to watch ome movie called The Dark Red and finish my coffee.

today is my mom's birthday~~ got her Chanel perfume and some other bits and bobs. tonight I plan on staying home and taking some magic mushrooms and relax. might play a bit of Overwatch. I wish I had a gaming chair here, but it's at my boyfriend's. might get another one to have home at as well. can't wait til Halloween, my bf and I are going as Roger Rabbit and Jessica Rabbit. I'm gonna be Roger he's gonna be Jessica :D I have been low carb dieting for 4 weeks now. I lost like 4 - 5 lbs on week 3. I want to lose like 15 more though. so in a couple months I should be at my goal weight. going to finish this movie I am watching called Rupture. ✌️

weekend full

 my weekend was full of parties, psychedelics, alcohol  etc. I'm just now done recovering. we went to dinner with a bunch of friends for my boyfriend's birthday on Saturday. then headed out & got shitfaced. I slept practically 2 whole days. had to order 2 new ponytail extensions since my others got tangled/ruined because I had previously used chemicals on them. I'm going to tone the new ones with purple shampoo instead of chemicals. hope that helps keep them nice. 

might go out to taco Tuesday tonight. if it ends up raining, gonna head to get Mexican food at a different restaurant that's indoors. I can't wait until it started to get cooler out here... but that doesn't usually happen until mid October. I need to get my Halloween costumes soon. I need 2. 

finally

after months of a broken gaming computer I finally am able to use the gaming laptop. my brother is giving me his. back to Overwatch, bitch! 

Chintzy still doesn't like being picked up. he's still super skiddish and it makes me so sad. at least he's super active in his cage. constantly running on his wheels and comes out a lot. he's just scared of movement :( and doesn't want to be held. ugh

stupid hurricanes are active a lot but I hope so bad they don't hit FL in my area.

my bf's b'day is coming and we're renting a hotel on the beach together <3 he wanted to rent a cabin in the springs but it's completely booked. 

created 9/10/20

I want to use this to post anything and everything. Ever since I accidentally deleted my Tumblr blog/website I've missed posting blog entries. The Tumblr I have now is mostly for re-blogging other people's things I find appealing. So this is more for me to post more than just pictures. Recipes my boyfriend and I try out, fashion and makeup things and general blogging. I want to buy a domain name to redirect to this so I can have my own again. So that will be coming soon as it is in the works. 👍